Have I actually introduced myself?

Me at Glastonbury Tor, December 2024

Hi, my name is Theresa, but I am also known as Chandra in some circles.

I am 59, with my next milestone birthday looming very large before the end of 2025.

I have been married for decades and have two adult sons. I’ve been a housewife, mother, nursemaid, cook but never bottle washer. I’ve been mum, so and so’s mum, y’s wife, Teacher, Miss, Mrs X and so many other variations that hid my actual identity. It was as if I wasn’t important unless I was attached to a ‘more noteworthy individual’. I was just background, there to make sure others shined brightly and were seen and heard. This has been my life for so long that I really believed there was no other option. I had my role and I should be grateful of it.

However, one day there was a shift; I have become ungrateful. I started wondering and questioning every aspect of my role.

What if I want more?

What if I let the family fend for themselves? What if I step back on organising stuff?

What if I start looking for me?

What would that look like?

What would that feel like?

Could I actually do this?

My ‘journey to me’ started as all journeys do with a single step followed by another. As I progressed I began to realise My role no longer served me, that my time as family carer and organiser was over. I needed so much more and I needed to move forward, to find not just me but also my lost spirit and my very Soul.

Needless to say, I’ve fumbled, I’ve fallen and I’ve taken many wrong turns and had to backtrack, I’ve explored teachings that really do not resonate with me. I’ve found a few intriguing snippets that I’m still investigating, some I’m sure will fall by the wayside while others will soar.

I have been blessed to meet many beautiful souls and to connect deeply with some very special ones. I am just beginning to see a glimpse of a possible future me and I know I have many more journeys to complete before I find my authentic self.

This adventure that I am just about to embark on is all part of that. With the help of my empathetic friend, and my Guide, we are going to explore many avenues within nature to help set my Soul free. Whatever we discover, it will be exhilarating, life changing and powerful. Alaska is nature at its rawest. To me it feels as if It is the perfect canvas on which to seek one’s true identity.